love and it’s rules.

While we wait for the perfect time, id like to address the next thing in my mind lately; what’s wrong with it? Yes, I’m talking about the fact of falling in love it’s a whole process in which one must participate, the waiting process, the playing hard to get process, not so available process, if you kiss the guy on the first date you’re screwed!… or things like be mysterious, don’t talk too much and also while doing all this you must look for red flags because what if in the end turns out not to be what you were expecting from the beginning.

Playing hard to get.

I think it’s a heart felt situation and you must use your heard wisely before making a decision you might regret later on, but is it really important the time you take to answer someones message? If you have the time in the moment yes! If you’re busy then later! For sure the other person will understand. When I think gets obsessive is when you stop your world from moving on to wait for a response, when you check every few minutes for new messages, or when talk non stop just to get a “ok” as response. Stop, breathe and just be your own self. 

Not so available. 

Please understand in life it’s important to say no sometimes and the importance of having a balance because you don’t want to become the most VIP person in the room when someone is asking you out. Learn it’s important to pay attention to the person but without having to cancel your dentist appointment just to hangout with a particular person you’re currently getting to know, if they are interested they may understand and pick a different date. Also if the place makes you uncomfortable, it’s healthy to say no and pick a different one. 

Kisses on the first date.

People will tell you they have rules, things one should do just “to impress” the other person… trust me, I already heard a few of them and because of it missed great things from happening and also due to my self esteem issues. I think that if chemistry is there and all your stars are aligned why would you refrain from doing it? You won’t become a “happy life person” just for that, takes more than that I think. Don’t overthink it, this many times lead me into places I could never get out from. One advise for my younger self: do it!

Being mysterious.

This is where I personally think struggle the most maybe because I’m pretty much of an open book, I struggle to keep things to my self and some might find that not so amusing but you know what? That’s fine because at this point in my life I’ve chosen to be the “better in your face, than behind your back” type of person, at least most of the times and if one is not happy about it, maybe it’s time for me to pack my love bags and call it a day, it might sound drastic but I think honesty is the best foundation from the very beginning to not make me waist my time or vice versa.  

After putting some of those things on the table now I just wonder, what time exactly does this whole process ends? Or if it ever does, when does the fun part starts? The going on trips, sharing stuffs like a toothbrush, sox, necklaces… I don’t know you name it, when does it all really starts? For how long you may have to be on this pending status, maybe waiting to see what’s the next move, or what if there’s never a next move and you’re just there hanging like the last piece in your closet that you just live there in case you ever need it, the shirt is nice, you really don’t want to throw it in the trash or maybe give it to someone else that could really give a good use to it. No, it will be just hanging there until only God knows when.

It really makes me think about that so many times I have played that part on someones closet, expecting a day I might never see and sorry if I’m being negative, but aren’t you supposed to be able at least to have a good start at something? Don’t you deserve to know actually the route this love boat it taking?… but how can you know, remember we’re in that first stage, the place where you have to play it cool and wait.

But then again, what if you could just turn things a little bit loose by maybe taking an inch of it skipped, by taking that inch you can easily turn things more in your favor a little bit sooner, get the right amount of attention and maybe, just maybe being able to finally move into the next step. For some is not easy some times, trust me I deal with it all day, but what’s the worst thing that can happen? You can yet a positive response or you can get a no and being able to give it a closure, and if you read my last story by this point you may know I’m all about it at this point in life. 

Ditching the shirt or finally finding creative ways to style it, the session its all in our hands, we are the ones in control and we decide when is the right time and switch things up!